Day 9/10

Trying to navigate the stormy waters or my family is quite hard and it’s only 2 people. My sister whose older and my brother/son whose younger. I don’t like to play pretend I’ve never been a fake person besides during sex so I pride myself on being my. I’m honest and true in most everything I do.

So I asked my sister if we could all sit down and talk about whatever we need to. We are off track and don’t seem like a family just 3 distant people and seem to be lost. I say lost because we’ve been through a lot and I don’t think we ever found ourselves as a family. My siblings are overly selfish and it’s so sad because I’m the opposite. I’ve spent my life ensuring they were taken care of and went for their dreams. I’ve been their cheerleader in all they do but as I said we a lost family and it’s sad.

I’m on the track to adopt my 2 daughters and the one thing I refuse to have around them is people here today and ghost tomorrow. They need consistency all around and if they can’t make me feel they will be there imma just have to leave them where they are. It sounds sad but I can’t put my children at risk for what they put me through emotionally. Life is so fragile and one move can make everlasting effects. I have to protect my children’s moments that I can control…..

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